Memories on Memorial Day- Some Old Time Values
As I brush the old dead grass off of the base of his gravestone, and place the fresh flowers beside it, I am reminded, on this Memorial Day, of my step-father, William (Willie) Atteberry.
He is not an official entry on my genealogy family tree, but somehow it feels like he should be.
He was not a veteran, but he was a patriotic citizen who loved his country, and helped preserve it.
I treasure him because of what he did for my mother, for her kids (including me), for her grandkids (our children), and simply for the uniquely fine human being that he was.
I highly suspect that his character and many of his values were a reflection of the era in which he lived, but I’m just biased enough to think that, this notwithstanding, he was something special.
I’ve decided to reprint the eulogy I wrote for Willie when he died, so maybe you can see what I mean.
_________________________
William Edgar Atteberry 1895-1992 — A husband, a father, a father-in-law, a stepfather, a grandfather, a relative, a friend. What was it that made him so special — a genuine article — a one of a kind?
And how do you measure the influence a man like this has had on others in his lifetime, and the nature of his lasting influence.
In years, decades, even centuries to come a little girl or boy — descendants of Willie Atteberry or others who knew him well — will sit on their mother’s or father’s lap and hear about how important it is to be honest, to tell the truth, make your word good, to treat others as you want to be treated, and to pay your debts on time.
They will be told that on a job, you should always get there early and give an honest days work. They will hear about the value of good black soil, the good things about farming, and how a young man named Willie who came to central Illinois with 35¢ in his pocket went on to become a successful farmer.
They will hear how important it is to conserve resources — to tile and plant fields well so the soil won’t wash away, and to plant trees so future generations can enjoy them. And yes, they will hear the philosophy that if you earn a nickel you should save at least 4¢.
They will hear about the importance of minding your own business, treating others fairly, but not letting anyone push you around. They will learn the virtues of good country food, horses, and cow’s milk. They will hear that a good life is being generous, and helping those in need.
They may even hear a simple, inspiring story about how a small boy, with no mother and limited support from his father, ran away from an uncaring relative’s home at the age of 7 years and made it on his own by being honest, living a clean life, and by putting in a lifetime of hard work.
William Atteberry — educated, but with no formal education beyond the early grades. A man who claimed that without education a person “doesn’t have any more chance than a one-legged man in a rump kicking contest” — but a man who had a Ph.D. degree, with highest honors, in common sense.
William Atteberry — a model of simple everyday application of religious principles, an inspiration to those around him, and a solid person you could always count on.
William Atteberry — independent, strong minded, but one who knew who he was, what he stood for, and who was successful in the finest sense of the word. He often said that, living on the “poor farm,” he might have to “get a tin bill and pick with the chickens.” You never had to, Willie, and you never will.
Phares O’Daffer, October, 1992